Santa: today I made a fool of water?
Banta: how did you do that?
Santa: I heated some water for a bath and bathed with
cold water
-------
Santa: My wife is still scared of water
Banta: how come?
Santa: yesterday when i went home,
she was in the bath tub with the security guard!!
--------
Santa to his wife: darling, years ago u had a figure
like coke bottle.
Jeeto: yes darling i still do, only differnece is
earlier it was 300ml
now it's 1.5 ltr.
-----------
banta: you cheated me.
shopkeeper: no, i sold a good radio to you.
banta: radio label shows made in japan but radio says
this is all india radio!
-----------
nurse: congrats santa, you are a father.
santa: don't tell my wife, i want to surprise her!
------------
Everybody was angry with the hike in petrol prices
Santa: Sir, why are you so angry?
Sir: The petrol price is increasing day-by-day, this
is not fair.
Santaji, you don't look worried?
Santa: Why should i worry. For me it is the same
price.
Sir: how come?
Santa: Earlier also i filled for Rs 100 now also i
fill for rs 100!
Sir: ???????????
Marketing Techniques...rool on
A Professor at one of the IIM's (INDIA) was explaining Marketing
concepts to the Students:-
1. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say: "I am
very rich. Marry me!" - That's Direct Marketing
2. You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a gorgeous girl.
One of your friends goes up to her and pointing at you says: "He's very rich.
Marry him." - That's Advertising
3. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and get her
telephone number. The next day, you call and say: "Hi, I'm very rich.
Marry me." - That's Telemarketing
4. You're at a party and see gorgeous girl. You get up and straighten
your tie, you walk up to her and pour her a drink, you open the door (of the
car) for her, pick up her bag after she drops it, offer her ride and then
say:" By the way, I'm rich. Will you marry me?" - That's Public
Relations
5. You're at a party and see gorgeous girl. She walks up to you and
says: "You are very rich! Can you marry! Me?" - That's Brand Recognition
6. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say: "I am
very rich. Marry me!" She gives you a nice hard slap on your face. - That's
Customer Feedback
7. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say: "I am
very rich. Marry me!" And she introduces you to her husband. - That's demand
and supply gap
8. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and before you
say anything, another person come and tell her: "I'm rich. Will you marry
me?" and she goes with him - That's competition eating into your market share
9. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and before you
say: "I'm rich, Marry me!" your wife arrives. - That's restriction for
entering new markets
concepts to the Students:-
1. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say: "I am
very rich. Marry me!" - That's Direct Marketing
2. You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a gorgeous girl.
One of your friends goes up to her and pointing at you says: "He's very rich.
Marry him." - That's Advertising
3. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and get her
telephone number. The next day, you call and say: "Hi, I'm very rich.
Marry me." - That's Telemarketing
4. You're at a party and see gorgeous girl. You get up and straighten
your tie, you walk up to her and pour her a drink, you open the door (of the
car) for her, pick up her bag after she drops it, offer her ride and then
say:" By the way, I'm rich. Will you marry me?" - That's Public
Relations
5. You're at a party and see gorgeous girl. She walks up to you and
says: "You are very rich! Can you marry! Me?" - That's Brand Recognition
6. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say: "I am
very rich. Marry me!" She gives you a nice hard slap on your face. - That's
Customer Feedback
7. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say: "I am
very rich. Marry me!" And she introduces you to her husband. - That's demand
and supply gap
8. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and before you
say anything, another person come and tell her: "I'm rich. Will you marry
me?" and she goes with him - That's competition eating into your market share
9. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and before you
say: "I'm rich, Marry me!" your wife arrives. - That's restriction for
entering new markets
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