1. Regular naps prevent old age... especially if you take them while driving.
2. Having one child makes you a parent; having two makes you a referee.
3. Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband!
4. They said we should all pay our tax with a smile. I tried- but they wanted cash.
5. A child's greatest period of growth is the month after you've purchased new school uniforms.
6. Don't feel bad. A lot of people have no talent.
7. Don't marry the person you want to live with, marry the one you cannot live without... but whatever you do, you'll regret it later.
8. You can't buy love. . But you pay heavily for it.
9. True friends stab you in the front.
10. Forgiveness is giving up my right to hate you for hurting me.
11. Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote.
12. Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired.
13. My wife and I always compromise. I admit I'm wrong and she agrees with me.
14. Those who can't laugh at themselves leave the job to others.
15. Ladies first. Pretty ladies sooner.
16. It doesn't matter how often a married man changes his job, he still ends up with the same boss.
17. They call our language the mother tongue because the father seldom gets to speak.
18. Saving is the best thing. Especially when your parents have done it for you.
19. Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools talk because they have to say something.
20. Real friends are the ones who survive transitions between address books
Last Evacuation Drill
XYZ Office -> A fire alarm rang at 6 PM when almost all shift
employees are in office(approx 5000). As usual entire office
was evacuated within 3 mins & every employee gathered
outside office. 10 mins passed..................................
5 more mins passed.
Security Officer -> Announcement started, "Dear Employees
- With melting heart I am making this announcement that for
many of you it will be a last evacuation drill, as we are laying
off almost 80% employee. While moving in who-so-ever ID
card won't work are lay off & all their belongings will be
couriered to them tomorrow. We followed this approach as
we don't want to fill email box size with layoff mail in thousands
& also to avoid any fight inside office". Hope you have nice
career ahead. Please move in & try your luck.
employees are in office(approx 5000). As usual entire office
was evacuated within 3 mins & every employee gathered
outside office. 10 mins passed..................................
5 more mins passed.
Security Officer -> Announcement started, "Dear Employees
- With melting heart I am making this announcement that for
many of you it will be a last evacuation drill, as we are laying
off almost 80% employee. While moving in who-so-ever ID
card won't work are lay off & all their belongings will be
couriered to them tomorrow. We followed this approach as
we don't want to fill email box size with layoff mail in thousands
& also to avoid any fight inside office". Hope you have nice
career ahead. Please move in & try your luck.
God & Marwadi.
A Marwadi having no child, no money, no home, a blind mother, prays to God.
God happy with his prayers, grants him only ONE wish!
Marwadi : I want my mother to see my wife putting Diamond bangles on my Child's hands in our new home!
God : Damn !!! I still have a lot to learn from these Marwadi's
Lessons learnt from the above story:-Compile all requirements and present in one line rather than boring appraiser for long time.
God happy with his prayers, grants him only ONE wish!
Marwadi : I want my mother to see my wife putting Diamond bangles on my Child's hands in our new home!
God : Damn !!! I still have a lot to learn from these Marwadi's
Lessons learnt from the above story:-Compile all requirements and present in one line rather than boring appraiser for long time.
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